Several years ago before Cliff and I were married, I was taking a Relationship Class for women at a spiritual-healing training institute. For one exercise, the instructor asked us to visualize the image and energy of a person we might want to have a relationship with. I was relatively new at guided visual meditations, yet I saw immediately the image of a man— tall, good looking, dark hair, blue eyes, successful, making lots of money… Then, the instructor passed out balloons and asked us to blow that image and everything that we wanted in the relationship into the balloon. I was really excited, my image was really special- perfect!
After we blew up our balloons, the instructor asked us to get up and lay our balloons in our chairs. She had us move one seat over and feel the energy of the balloon next to us. All the balloons were about the same size in different colors. As I felt the balloon, I could feel a vibration and warm. The instructor asked us to continue moving one seat over and feel the next balloons. To my amazement, each balloon felt different. Some cool, some prickly, some lighter, some denser energy. As I proceeded around, I kept looking from the corner of my eye to see the response to my balloon in the chair. I saw different reactions, some pulled their hands away and grimaced, others left with a questioning look and shrugged their shoulders. Although the responses were different, none of the women seemed thrilled to feel “my special balloon”. I was a bit shaken…
When we had gone around the whole circle, the instructor asked us all to sit back in our chairs and feel the energy of our own balloon that we had filled with the image of the relationship we were seeking. I had to admit, my balloon didn’t feel great, even to me!
The instructor went on the explain that we often attempt to create relationships of what we think we “should” want based on family and societal expectations rather than what our heart really wants. She asked us to sit on the balloon in our hands and break it, letting all the energy in that balloon vaporize in the air and neutralize.
This time, she asked us to ask our heart what it wanted in a relationship, and see the image of that in front of us. At first the image wasn’t real clear, but I had a definite sense that this person needed to be spiritual, with similar values to mine. I could feel that he would be light-hearted , with a sense of humor, a deep desire to explore and see the world, intelligent and successful yet in a more inclusive way without sacrificing other aspects of life or limiting others. As the image became clearer, I saw a man that was good looking, yes had to have dark hair and blue eyes… tall? No, that’s not really so important… Playful, passion/intimacy. My heart was showing me a deeper yearning of want I really wanted. No wonder the men I had dated seemed so shallow!
Shortly after, I met my husband Cliff. Since each of us had just been in relationships, we decided that we wanted to explore, play, share trust and intimacy for a year. We knew we would become good friends, yet didn’t feel each other were potential husband/wife material. At the time, we really didn’t have much in common other than our spiritual connection, having met at the Spiritual/Healing Training Institute.
Since I had never had a brother, I asked Cliff everything. Personal questions that I would never ask a potential “husband”. A couple months into our relationship, I even asked Cliff to go with me to pick out china and crystal patterns. I wanted everything possibly stressful out of the way, before I actually did get engaged to my future husband. Then, six months after we started “playing”, we both realized at the same time, “Oh, S—- I think I’m in love with you!”.
What I didn’t know is that around the same time that I had taken this Relationship Class, Cliff had written a list of all the qualities he wanted in a woman. What we realized is that the person we deeply yearned in a relationship was right in front of us. I’m now see the great wisdom and value in marrying your best friend– through the years he has become my love, my evolutionary partner, my best teacher…
BREATH AWARENESS MEDITATION:
- Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.
- Focus your awareness on the movement and sound of your breath. Follow and feel your breath through your nose, your lungs, your bronchial, your alveoli, to your small capillaries that bring oxygenated blood to your heart.
- Feel the breath go deep into your belly. With each inhale, feel your belly expand. With each exhale, feel your belly contract.
- With every inhale, feel how the “air” moves through your body and the field around you.
- With every exhale, feel yourself release whatever doesn’t “move” you. Let go of any energy that doesn’t serve you.
- Continue observing your breath without judgment, getting more still, more quiet, more relaxed. Feel the natural movement of energy (wind) within your body.
- Continue Breath Awareness Meditation daily.
- Connect with Nature- Notice your connection with AIR
- Observe the “movement” in your everyday activities.
- Breathe the breath of plants.
- Feel a gentle breeze on your face.
- Blow bubble and watch them float away.
- Notice the cycles of giving and receiving in nature.
BREATHE, MOVE, FEEL…
Loree Oberle-Edwards, MS, DD is a licensed minister, an instructor of the Chopra
Center for Well Being, and a Healing Touch Level 1 Instructor with the Healing Touch Program. A native of San Diego, she enjoys the blessings of life with her husband Cliff and cat, Athena.
For more information, email Loree at firstname.lastname@example.org